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oliviab
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Please grade my issue analysis

by oliviab Mon Dec 13, 2010 5:17 pm

"The desire of corporations to maximize profits creates conflict with the general welfare of the nation at large."

"The statement above makes a generalization about the profits maximization aimed by corporations, saying that the employed means can create conflicts with the general welfare of the nation at large. While I acknowledge that many more companies mainly aim at maximizing profits, I would contend that such strategies have several impacts on the society.

First of all, I would say that companies rarely consider the environmental impact there production process can have. On the long run, this can lead to alter the atmosphere, the biosphere and even inhibit the human development. Today, presidents and representants of he world leading countries are having meetings to determine a way in wich n each countries can contribute to environment protection.

Furthermore, maximizing profits often means satisfaying shareholders expectations, thus increasing thier investments and the companie's market value. Sometimes, managers don't care how work is done, but only focus on the increasing profits. In that way, employees do not have any word to say, their opinions won't be taken into consideration and they may not support such situations.

Similarly, when focusing on that same strategy, a corporation can take decisions without considering its clients satisfatcion. For expample, when a customer sale service is done by a "computer" , the client won't be as satisfied as if he was talking to a human person to explain his problem on the phone. The society will decrease its cost but in the meanwhile, it may loose a customer.

In sum, I would say that the desire of corporations to maximize profits creates conflict with the general nations at large since employees, clients and environment impacts are direct consequences of such strategies. "

Thank you very much for your time
StaceyKoprince
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Re: Please grade my issue analysis

by StaceyKoprince Mon Dec 13, 2010 9:57 pm

Hi, thanks for posting your essays! Just an FYI that instructors don't grade or give feedback on essays (see the forum guidelines for details).

But I certainly hope other community members respond. Also, if you're in our class, you'll have an opportunity to get essays graded and get written feedback during the course (after class 6).

Finally, you can get essays graded by GMAT Write (the official essay grading service from the makers of the exam) - they'll both grade the essays and provide feedback as to how to improve (for a fee). For details and pricing, go to www.mba.com and search for GMAT Write.
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thanghnvn
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Re: Please grade my issue analysis

by thanghnvn Thu Nov 24, 2011 7:38 am

The following is my essay.
For issue esay, I think that the idea and structure can be flexible, provided that we have clear content, ideas and structure. I am non native and can not use hard vocabulary. I used simple words and sentences to convey rich ideas because there is no time for using complex sentence. Is that right? I used to get 6 on toefl writing, using the simple word.

expert, pls, comment on the above idea.

Some persons think that maximizing profits conflict with general welfare of the nation. Other think that the process dose not conflict with the welfare. This problem is controversial. I prefer the first idea. There must be a conflict. I can see that for many reasons, the maximizing profits conflicts with the generalwelfare.

The first reason is that the companies ,to maximize profit, try to reduce tax paid to government. In doing so, the company dose not help the government to make welfare. You can see that many companies hire good accountant so that to reduce the tax. This practice is very popular.

The second reason is that to maximize profits, the company try to pay less to the workers and the workers have no money to pay tax to government. This process makes government no money to spend for welfare. In my country, big companies and international companies pay low salaries to the workers. This new slavers receive a little money and pay income taxes which is too small. Even, small companies pay salaries which are under minimum one.

The third reason for my idea is that the companies directly conflict with the welfare by harming the welfare. One example is that the companies normally pollute the environment. In my country, most companies have some problem with environment and are criticize. Some companies make waste water. Other companies mak toxic gas. It is clear that the companies have conflict with the general welfare.

In conclusion, I say that companies create conflict with the general welfare when they try to maximize profits. This is unavoidable.
thanghnvn
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Re: Please grade my issue analysis

by thanghnvn Thu Nov 24, 2011 7:39 am

I reply to take notification which I forgot to require.
StaceyKoprince
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Re: Please grade my issue analysis

by StaceyKoprince Mon Nov 28, 2011 5:05 pm

please see my reply to your other posts - thanks!
Stacey Koprince
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ManhattanGMAT